23 Things No-One Tells You About Planning a Wedding

1. A secret Pinterest board is not a sufficient planning tool.

2. Yes, £20,000 is actually a normal, average price for a wedding.

3. You will become so overwhelmed with decisions-to-make that your brain will turn to mush.

4. You are expected to organise a large scale event, with little previous experience, including the people you care about most in the world, for the one and only time you get married and you have to do it ‘right’.

5. You think you want a small shindig until you start writing the guest-list.

6. 200 people later…

7. Suddenly you have an opinion on lace, satin, silk, organza and all other kinds of fabrics.

8. Chair covers will never look good.

9. How much for a cake?!

10. You wish somebody else can make the hard decisions for you … but then you realise they’ll also charge a premium as well.

11. Couples plan two years in advance for good reason … this shiz is EXPENSIVE!

12. You think “oh…. I’ll just go with the cheap option and just stick a tent up in a field and have a laid-back kind of wedding….” – Then you look at prices for tipis and marquees and realise it’s cheaper to hire a hotel!

13. You seriously consider eloping.

14. You wonder whether engagement parties are necessary? Do I need one? What if I don’t have one? Are they even a thing anymore?

15. You suddenly become an expert on barns, fields for hire, hotels, manor houses, and all kinds of potential wedding venues.

16. A venue quotes you a £2k corkage charge and you no longer flinch.

17. You decide it’s probably cheaper not to have any friends. Good job really …

18. You consider elopement again.

19. You have spreadsheets for EVERYTHING. There’s even a spreadsheet for your spreadsheets.

20. Everyone has an opinion or a piece of advice for you.

21. But apparently you should just ‘do whatever is important to you’…. whatever that is? Who even knows?

22. No matter how hard you try to make a decision your brain gives up and makes for the nearest exit.

23. Better start a new spreadsheet…

Go on, give me your best wedding advice! I dare ya!

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16 Comments

  1. 17 February 2016 / 7:37 pm

    This takes me right back and we had 2. I would still love a vowel renewal (not sure P is up for it though). All the stress will be worth it, promise x

    • Elizabeth
      Author
      17 February 2016 / 9:29 pm

      Eeek! TWO, wowzers … that must have been quite something.

  2. Michelle
    17 February 2016 / 8:40 pm

    This made me laugh! I would love to give advice but I wasn’t a fan of the whole wedding planning process. I think it helped that I actually did it from a distance. Can I just say you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to so I wouldn’t bother with the engagement party. What was the point of them to start with?

    • Elizabeth
      Author
      17 February 2016 / 9:36 pm

      That’s what I’m thinking. Plus, we’re getting married this year so by the time I organise an engagement party we’ll be ready for the wedding!

  3. 17 February 2016 / 9:17 pm

    Ahh happy days!! Just don’t stress! All you need to do is say your I Dos, have a disco and an open bar and everyone will be happy!!

    (P.s. Our wedding in 2012 cost a total of around £10k and that included the honeymoon)

    • Elizabeth
      Author
      17 February 2016 / 9:37 pm

      £10k?! Please tell me your secret …. if you say you only invited 30 people I’ll scream! 😉

  4. 17 February 2016 / 11:19 pm

    Good luck miss. I’ve never been as stressed as I was trying to appease everyone’s wishes.
    Screw that, never again.
    Good luck!

  5. Caroline
    18 February 2016 / 7:29 am

    First of all congrats! Xx
    Every married person does have advice! You two will have advice one day. It can’t be stopped :’)
    I got married in 2011 and we’ve had 3 close family members get married since. I think looking at them we didn’t realise how self consumed and all things weddingy everything becomes!
    I would say don’t spend a fortune on a dress. Everyone I know looking back would choose a different dress! Plus it’s only for 1 day! 😉
    Also find a photographer you love because those pictures will be the lasting memories.
    If you ever have babies the opinions will just keep coming :/ So just try and enjoy yourselves and ignore people. People are the worst. Xx

    • Caroline
      18 February 2016 / 7:31 am

      You *too

  6. Emma
    18 February 2016 / 8:30 am

    I second not spending much on the dress. There are so many inexpensive options now and it is just not worth it for one day! We also spent less than £10k including honeymoon back in 2006. My big tip – get married in an area where things tend to be cheaper (for us Herefordshire). We still had 130 people in a beautiful venue but everything from venue rental, to catering, to corkage, to hairdressing was about half the price friends in the South paid!

  7. 18 February 2016 / 10:59 am

    This made me laugh and brought back many memories!!! We ended up spending about £12k including 13days honeymoon in Switzerland (not inc costs of food etc). I agree about the dress, I saw a Designer wedding dress from a 2009 collection online when I Googled ‘Jane Austen wedding dress’ which was £2900 when it was available but I actually found someone selling it months later on ebay for £200!!! I spent more on my Jenny Packham beaded headband!
    Is there anyone you know who might make a cake-my mum made ours. Someone I know had a tower of cupcakes which friends all made and another friend served the wedding cake straight after the wedding whilst photos were being taken so she didn’t need canapes and everyone reeeeally appreciated the wedding cake rather than being stuffed when it was time to eat it later in the evening. It meant her wedding photos of cake cutting were rather light and lovely too. We saved on a photographer as we took a chance on a friend of my stepmum who wanted to get wedding experience and it only cost us £350 all in! They were great photos although she was not v assertive in getting us to pose etc!

    Don’t bother with wedding favours or just sling some sweets in a bowl etc!
    Good luck!!!!!

  8. 18 February 2016 / 3:48 pm

    I am in the event industry and I’ve had a wedding, and I must say – I 100% completely agree with you on chair covers! Never! They will never look good!

  9. 18 February 2016 / 6:37 pm

    Well this sounds like fun! One of the many reasons we’re one of the couples giving ourselves 2 years to plan. I am not looking forward to being in your shoes with only a few months to go but I wish you all of the luck! Have you found a venue yet? I did a freelance job recently as a wedding researcher for a woman looking for somewhere to seat 150 people all day and that was a challenge! Also, wedding cakes are ridiculously expensive for what they are so I think we’re just going to serve ours as dessert – I’ve read about far too many couples who said they didn’t even eat theirs. Loving these posts btw. Oh and completely agree with the chair covers – they are awful! 🙂 x

  10. Lotty
    18 February 2016 / 7:28 pm

    Congratulations! My wedding cost £4000 pounds. I had only very close family and friends come and had a low key wedding with 50 people. I managed to get everthing for that price. Good luck with the planning.
    PS. A little bit of advice I was given. Plan the wedding you want, not the one you think you should have.

  11. 22 February 2016 / 5:15 pm

    Lol! Oh bless you! Number 1 made me laugh!
    Good luck with it all!

  12. Emily Jayne
    23 February 2016 / 9:55 am

    Yes to all of these!!! 😀

    One thing I will say though, is that it does get better – we’ve got all of the logistical stuff done now and all of a sudden we seem to be planning the pretty bits I was pinning nearly 2 years ago and it’s a lot more fun! xxx

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